Bike Safari Tours in Miami Beach and beyond?

[His Highness the TibetanMonkey, originator of the Stop the Bullshit Campaign]

(I posted this at the local forum. I wonder if they don't censor it.
The moderator kind of likes me since he's a cyclist and has been hit
himself, so we'll see. Notice, the tours may be expanded into your
city too!)

Well, the Bicycle Program seems to finally be coming this April 15th.
Great, at least there will be "safety in numbers," a survival strategy
practiced by many species in the Kalahari desert. The alligators and
other beasts just sit there waiting for the herd to come...

To be honest, our roads don't have any sign of being tamed by bike
facilities nor do the beasts seem to be under control of any sort. I'm
still grinding and walking bicycles and shamefully bumping pedestrians
along the way. (I even say sorry.)

I dare to propose a Safari Tour for Europeans for those of you who
like "life on the wild side," at least for a short while. Yes, at the
end of the trip, you will have the satisfaction of having survived
among the beasts --if you survive. The beasts will be real and
untamed. If they are drugged it's because they took it on their own.
This a REALITY SHOW.

We will be launching from the causeway (Channel 7 to be exact) to
secure TV coverage from a station known to be where the mayhem is, and
then proceed to Indian Creek (around 65 ST), the MOST DANGEROUS PLACE
ON EARTH FOR A BIKE. When we get to South Beach where we know things
are fairly safe and then we can relax a little before we head back. We
may take a plunge in the ocean as well looking for the sharks. No, not
many.

Hey, we may decide to go to the Nudist Beach over that deadly bridge
at Haulover and finally decide that it's better to ride a beach
cruiser on the sand. Of all the bikes I have I can only enjoy the
beach cruiser. But you are looking for excitement, right?


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[His Highness the TibetanMonkey, originator of the Stop the Bullshit Campaign]

First of all, Perry vetoed a bill that had actually passed unanimously
through both houses because it "put too much punishment on drivers".

Let's face it, Texas doesn't consider cyclists as humans and the next
logical step would be to bring them to the gas chambers. Hey, don't be
terrified! It would be a quick, humane death compared to the grinding
suffering of riding in hostile traffic.

But, again, you can find some trail to Oregon while you can.

[His Highness the TibetanMonkey, originator of the Stop the Bullshit Campaign]

I have pretty much no problem sharing the road. What I have a problem
with is motorist hostility.
What is one of the most fundamental tenets of driving a car on the
road. Keep it between the lines, right?
Sharing the lane to pass a bicyclist in the same lane - no matter how
wide it is - presents drivers more of a stressful conundrum to drivers
than simply keeping it between the lines.

So it's your duty to reduce stress for the poor motorists? Give me a
break! They've got enough privileges. And if the lane is wide enough
for their travel lane plus a bike lane, the least competent of them
would be able to fit their car next to you, stripe or no stripe.
Apparently, you're much more willing to be rude to people here on the
internet than on the road. On a bike, you turn into a shrinking
flower who prefers to stay in his ghetto to maintain bowing, scraping
deference.
To quote you, Dan: "No offense," but grow some balls.
- Frank Krygowski

What a loaded word you use... ghetto. So it sounds like the Jews or
the blacks in their hellish places.

Then the cyclists in Holland or Copenhagen as subject to
discrimination and subjugation, while you Americans --less than 1%
that is-- are "free" to ride among traffic. That was a good joke.

Tell you what, if you can't deliver a bike lane then give me the whole
traffic lane. I don't want to share with drivers talking on the phone
or texting.

[His Highness the TibetanMonkey, originator of the Stop the Bullshit Campaign]

My estimate is the 99.999% of the road mileage in the US has no bike
facilities. (Feel free to prove me wrong, if you can. It's just my
estimate.) However, I find that the vast bulk of road mileage in the
US is fine for bicycling just as it is.
Can you imagine Adventure Cycling suddenly deciding to shut down
because of a lack of bike lanes?

Just show us a proof (something like a video) that has the the bikes
sharing with traffic in sufficient numbers to call it a solution.

By the same token our sidewalks may seem like more of a solution than
roads since most cyclists around here share those with pedestrians --
often terrorizing them.

It's the inexorable Law of the Jungle where the pedestrians lie at the
very bottom of the food chain.

[His Highness the TibetanMonkey, originator of the Stop the Bullshit Campaign]

(from my local forum)
Posted by Jess
"Once the deco bike program launches, motorists in Miami Beach will
have no choice but to move over and give way to bicycles. The bikes
are going to take over

Have to?
You're talking about Miami Beach, right? Home of the old geezers that can't
see beyond their Cadillac hood ornaments. "I had the right of way" is going
to look great as an epitaph on your tombstone.
Pressure the city (over the screaming objections of developers) to put in
more dedicated bike lanes. Not take them out. Stop letting the anti car
crusaders use bicycles as speed bumps.

First Tunisia, next Egypt, then Miami Beach...

Get the hint? ;)

[softsofa]

On Mon, 7 Mar 2011 07:21:29 -0800 (PST), "His Highness the
TibetanMonkey, originator of the Stop the Bullshit Campaign"

[blah]

Don't forget your water-wings.

Cuba has lots of bike, but so does Bermuda.



[]softsofa[]